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“A fact is just a true truth-bearer,” he said to me, his mouth wide and agape like a four hundred dollar mouthpiece. “A fact is just an obtaining state of affairs,” I responded while glaring back at him with the honesty that only adults can summon. “A fact is just a sui generis type of entity in which objects exemplify properties or stand in relations,” he responded while crossing the lawn and removing the spilt blood from his shoe.